Tess’ story

Written By Alex Farner

Firstly, I am so proud of Tess, because let’s be honest. It just wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t brave enough to trust me, show up and decide that the current relationship with her postpartum body wasn’t good enough.

“I never imagined being able to massage my belly before seeing Alex, or that a scar could change so dramatically from such a relatively small amount of touch. I will always feel grateful for her passion, care and expertise.” - Tess


Tess and I emailed each other exactly the same time. I asked her if she had a few words about her experience and she said she wanted to share how incredible the process and transformation had been.

So this is a combination from my perspective and Tess’ personal experience. We both hope that this story encourages another woman to be brave courageous and find help when she needs it.


 

It began with ‘normal’ aches and tension

After the birth of her second child, Tess was achy and sore. As time went on, she was constantly stiff and really, really tired. She put it down to having a new baby, a bouncy first born to run after, all the carrying, cuddles, sleepless nights… aka. being a mum.

But as the months went by, the aches persisted, until even her daily walk with the pram wasn’t feeling good anymore. Each time I’d see Tess in a group yoga class, her postpartum aches felt like it was getting worse, instead of better.

Her physical fatigue started to have an impact on her

  • ability to play with her kids or exercise

  • her mental health, mood and patience

  • her relationship to her body, which felt like it was broken

Having supported Tess through her pregnancy and early postpartum, I started to talk to her about a connection between her c-section scar, and the tension and fatigue she was holding in her body.


From apprehension to enthusiasm

As Tess weaned her son, she finally took the time for herself and booked in to see me. I could see right away that this was a conscious transition out of the depths of new born mothering, and a process of reclaiming her body. I wanted to do everything in power to support her as she grows alongside her children.

Here’s what Tess said:

“The little details make such a difference - from the calm beautiful space, to the warm cups of tea and chats, Alex really knows how to tune in to your needs as an individual.”

We took it slow, talked about her birth stories, her history and relationship with her abdomen. It was important to unravel on an emotional level, not only using the language of touch but also by giving Tess the time and space to speak her story in her own words.

“I was prepared for a lot of discomfort, but Alex made me feel safe, comfortable and held.”

My initial priority was to let Tess’ body know that it was safe to let go now. At the first touch there was a lot of tension and as we slowly explored, a gentle unwinding started to release memories, tears and bit by bit, dissolved fear.

“I was very protective and apprehensive about being touched on my abdominal scar and surrounding area, due to the physical trauma, ongoing sensitivity and psychological pain caused by the birth of my two children and multiple complex surgeries.”

A huge piece in Tess’ discomfort was connected to emotional holding. A disconnection to her abdomen and pelvis, was causing dysfunctional movement and holding patterns from her jaw, to her shoulders, back and bowels. These were subtle, just subtle enough to ‘put up with’ or put down to ‘normal’ aches and pains.

“After the first session I felt noticeably lighter and less fearful about that part of my body being touched, and able to breathe more easily.”

It’s important to note that sometimes these feelings happen instantly, sometimes they’re a slow simmer in the. days that follow.

It’s a bit like exercise. We know that one Pilates class will make some difference, but two or three close together will make significant change.

“After the second session the lumpy, stiff tissue felt substantially softer and I had much more capacity to breathe.”

Tess and I did 3 sessions over 4 weeks, and each session got a little deeper, and unravelled a new piece of the puzzle. By the third session Tess jumped straight up on the table, all apprehension gone and ready to be loved up and nourished!

“It was better than any spa experience because it was exactly what my body needed. Each session felt completely unrushed, gentle and, surprisingly - highly enjoyable!”



Fast forward to today

“The third session removed the lumpiness completely from some areas and now I barely have a ’shelf'. My partner couldn’t recognise it!”

It was clear to both of us that these sessions had been transformational in her relationship to her own body, boosting her confidence, brightening her mood and giving her an optimistic and positive outlook.

Physically she was less sore, walking again and ready to get back into exercise. Now she had the connection, knowlege, breathing and engagement techniques so that she would be safe and effectively engage her core - whether she was doing Pilates or playing with her kids.

I taught Tess some cupping techniques to continue and maintain this connection to her abdomen at home.

“I walked away feeling far more confident in my body, less rigid and protective, and I now look forward to massaging that area regularly using my own cup.”

A huge thank you to Tess for her trust, bravery and for sharing her experience with you.

Tess’ treatment plan included

Alex Farner
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